Saturday, September 30, 2006


I got some great pics of ty today! none of nate, but there is always tomorrow...

some of the news...

so this week has had it's little events, to say the least! we got word this week that we were approved for financing on a new vehicle. john's car has been in major need of replacement, so we are buying a pontiac wave...little, cute & in blue! we get to pick it up on thursday!

also, I started a new exercise class this week - totally great fun. I think I will endeavor to go on monday & wednesday nights, and cancel my gym membership. I haven't been to the gym in over a month, so why bother paying for it, when I've found something that I really enjoy? not to mention, lesley is a hoot!

and the weather has been SUPER! I am going to take a walk this afternoon...maybe with ty! we'll see [about the ty part!]. I really want to get some pictures of the boys playing outside in the leaves...

Sunday, September 24, 2006

a nice fall sunday...

we don't have church this morning [daryl & marge are away], so we are just taking it easy with the kids. nate is being nate & ty has a cold [he was up in the night, so very sad]. this week has been a little nuts for us - in fact, the last few weeks have been crazy, crazy, crazy. admittedly, I have been far too busy for my own good.

this weekend has been nice. nate, my mom & I went to the market yesterday morning. friday night, john & I went to the football game [sad outcome, but nice night!]. last night john, nate, my dad & dan went to the hockey game...nate was HYPER!! his very first hockey game.

and then there is school. there is a fine line, in my mind, between playing the game - balancing all the balls in the air, making everyone happy - and just wanting to scream and tell people that they are acting like they are in junior high. and these are not the kids I am talking about. I feel like I have created a position for myself that I don't really want...the knower of too much. people tell me things. I need to just learn to keep my big mouth shut. [yeah, like that is going to happen.] bottom line, I need to not be afraid to be honest with people, because for the most part, I really like the people I work with and I honestly care about them. I am always afraid. afraid that people won't like me. afraid that they don't think I am good at my job. afraid , afraid, afraid.

here in lies my problem in life. fear.

I just finished reading "the alchemist" by paulo coelho [be warned, everyone is getting this book for christmas!!]. coelho talks a lot about the fulfillment of one's personal legend, or doing what we were created in life to do. there is one quote though that sums up my struggle in life: "there is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure".

Monday, September 18, 2006

it's been a while!

okay, so I've been thinking. crazy, I know. I went for a long walk last week [the start of the week when it was still nice and fall-ish, not rainy & cold & generally miserable] and had a bit of a moment. I was doing the stairs into the ravine when it occurred to me that I am the only one responsible for the changes I want to see in my life. so, I guess it's going back to the baby steps. I am aiming this week to track all my calories, and NOT cheat on that! and wake up 15 minutes earlier than normal so I can eat breakfast at home and not on the run. I still need to cut the calories & add in the exercise, but that will come...I'll focus on the baby steps for now.

oh, and I'm FINALLY reading the alchemist...wowzers!

Monday, September 11, 2006


okay, now, where did I leave off??? I didn't really check the blog before writing more. k, here's the deal: when I don't write, I don't keep myself accountable. I may be busy, but there is nothing more important than...well, this. this is my life line, my accountability. I am an addict. a junkie. I love food, I love eating, I love over doing it, I love not thinking and being numb to everything. so here's the deal. I can admit it and do nothing, or I can admit it, own it, and change the fudge out of it. I really need to go back and re-read all my posts when I was kicking butt.

I am just SO slumped in so many ways. numb is the word. I HATE IT! so this last month has been out of control busy & this last week has topped it off with some other sort of crazy. I need a BIG kick in the butt. no more excuses. and just be exceptional in my own life, for me. and above all, I need to slow down and just enjoy the ride.

so, here's my commitment to you: I promise to blog. to stay connected. and I think to stop my love affair with sugar.